Don't know why, but lately I've been coming in in the middle of some amazingly interesting conversations.
Best overheard quote lately, from a girl I passed on the running trail (this is the only part of her conversation I heard):
"Next thing I know, it's in the back of my throat..."Second best overheard quote, from a girl at a bar:
"So I've got the strap-on on, and I'm doing her from behind, and all of a sudden somebody's finger's up my ass..."Third best quote, different girl, different bar:
"It's my birthday, and one way or another, I'm going to have a woman's tongue in my throat by the end of the night..."Dave
From: Oso
Date: 05 Dec 1996
bdk wrote:
Don't know why, but lately I've been coming in in the middle of some amazingly interesting conversations. (snip)Dave, Dave, Dave...ROOKIE drinking mistake. You ended up in a DIKER bar instead of a BIKER bar. Did you get any phone numbers? I THINK NOT ;-)
Oso
...next thing I know, she brings me the nipple clips and a bowl of ice...
From: Peter Vonder Haar
Date: 05 Dec 1996
bdk wrote:
Don't know why, but lately I've been coming in in the middle of some amazingly interesting conversations. (snip)Uh, Dave? This reminds me of the Simpsons episode where Homer gets banned from Moe's and is looking for a new bar. He ends up in one which is packed with nothing but large butch women.
[Homer]: "Wait a minute, there's something funny about this place...*gasp* This lesbian bar has no fire exits!" (runs out of bar)And with the beard I'd think you would have an even harder time passing for female than me.
[Adjacent Lesbian]: "What's *her* problem?"
Pete- Not that I try or anything
P.S. Actually, that last quote reminds me of the time I was at some party with a few good friends. One of them (we'll call him 'Brian') was in the clinch with some female when I espied him from the loft of the condo. I'd be damned if *Brian* was going to get some and leave me in the lurch, so I tromped downstairs, found a likely candidate and pleaded my case for about thirty seconds before she succumbed to my wily charms. Little did I know she was a co-worker of mine. And underage. Nothing like a high school student to boost your ego.
From: bdk
Date: 05 Dec 1996
(snip Oso and Pete's theories of me frequenting lesbian bars, as if there's anything wrong with that)
In the words of Paul Harvey, here's the rest of the story...
I can vouch for the hetero quality of all the establishments I mentioned. The first quote I heard while I was running on the trail around Town Lake here in Austin.
The second quote I heard at a bar in Montreal, during a party. Further research into the matter evidenced that the girl doing the talking definitely PREFERS men, but isn't all that picky when the moon's full, if you know what I mean and I think you do.
The third quote I heard at the Gingerman, the same outstanding bar where Pete and the wife met me and the GF. As it turned out, the girl in question was turning 30, and had decided that by that time she should have had at least one femme to femme experience, just so she could be a well-rounded woman of the world. (These kids today...)
Dave
Heading to a bar right now to gather more quotes...
From: Liam
Date: 06 Dec 1996
Peter Vonder Haar wrote:
(snip Peter's joke about Homer Simpson finding himself in a lesbian bar)About 15 years ago now, my friend "the major" told me that he would like to go to a new bar that he had seen and wanted to try. I thought it was a good idea so we went there. We got seated at the bar and ordered 2 beers. Hey! Only 50 cents! Great! Cold beer (American lager) and a frosted glass. all right! It was just after our first looooong thirsty swig from the glass that we noticed the naked cowboy pictures all around the bar. As we got more used to the low light level, more clues began to emerge: the guy at the end of the bar with no shirt and the nipple ring, the cigarette machine with the male ballerina in a tutu on the front, more cowboy pictures on the back wall who weren't ropin' cattle, etc. We turned to each other at *exactly* the same time and said: The Major:" I think we are in the wrong place" and me: "I want to talk to you NOW". We did leave, but regretted the good and cheap beer. I have heard since that the least expensive beer is to be had at gay bars. My friend still talks about it. He was upset because, before we left, the bartender hit on me and not him.
Memories. BTW to head off any unpleasantness, I am not a homophobe. I'm not inclined that way, but I don't feel that I am fit to judge anyone.
Liam
the village drunk - one of them anyway, tis a big village.
From: Jane
Date: 08 Dec 1996
Actuallty, my favorite nights to work the bar were on gay nitre.. best tips, no harrassment vby drunken fackers, and good times. Gay night rules. Even straight guys can have a blast oin gayu nights, if they get over the homophobre thing
oh fuck i cqant type too well now, can I? I just got myself a nuice new pint glass though, full of beer, courtes7y of the Artful Dodger...we left and UOI wasnt finished so I took my bevvie with me.\
So, by the way, we followed the pipers into the bar, and there waws no free beer, but i fou7nd a lotta my work froiend s there@! Apparently thre pipers piping down Yonge street wassupposed to be a re-enactment of the Rebellionm of eighteen-the-fack-whateve.
Idunno what this means
Chris is home. gonna go now.
jane